


Monza

by chasingpegasus



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-09
Updated: 2019-09-09
Packaged: 2020-10-13 10:36:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20581124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chasingpegasus/pseuds/chasingpegasus
Summary: Mattia needs to see Sebastian after he spun at Monza and ruined his own race.





	Monza

**Author's Note:**

> Just a short I wrote to make myself feel better after Seb's race. Already posted it on tumblr and many people liked it, so I decided to share it here. It's been a tough day for us, Seb fans, yesterday. Thanks for all the support and I hope my short will make you feel better as well.

“Give me that,” Mattia snatched an ice-pack out of Antti’s hand.

Sebastian’s physio tried to block the door. “He wants to be alone,” he said looking up at the huge Italian towering before him.

Mattia grabbed him by the shoulder. “What he wants is not what he needs.”

They looked each other in the eye before the physio stepped away and let the Ferrari boss enter the room.

Seeing the four-time Formula 1 world champion huddled in the corner of his little prep room, tears streaming down his face, Mattia froze.

Sebastian quickly grabbed a towel and wiped his eyes. “I don’t want to talk…” his voice cracked.

“Not here to talk.” In two big steps Mattia was right in front of him. “Stand up.”

Sebastian blinked with confusion. “Why are you acting-“

Mattia grabbed him firmly by the shoulder. “He told me to do it.”

“Who?” Sebastian was finally on his feet. “And… what?”

Mattia hesitated, suddenly remembering about the ice pack in his hand. _Antti. Tell him Antti asked you to give him the ice._

The Italian looked at the driver, at his red eyes and the deep wrinkle between his eyebrows, a sign of enourmous stress. He’s been seeing that wrinkle a lot.

He opened his mouth to say something about the spin and how he’s sorry, but not mad…

_That’s not what he needs_, he realized, opening his arms and pulling Sebastian into his embrace.

“Maurizio…” he muttered. “Told me to hug you.”

Sebastian wasn’t resisting. He didn’t move at all. “I’m not a child…”

Mattia just strengthened the embrace, telling himself to be patient. Nobody likes being vulnerable in front of their boss. Nobody wants to appear weak and in crisis.

It was hard to stay silent. He felt stupid and at one point he even had a thought that he’s being inapropriate.

But there was somethig about Sebastian’s body… something about the way the German slowly leanee against him…

When the German started crying again, Mattia felt a lump in his throat.

_My team just won the race. We won at Monza. Then why do I feel defeated?_

_If he’s happy, he’ll want to wrap his hands aroud your neck_, he recalled Maurizio’s words.

_He’s the opposite of happy now. And I’m too tall for him…_

He felt Seb’s hands on his back, quiet sobbing was the only sound in the room.

Mattia pressed his cheek to Seb’s hair, barely keeping himself from saying something.

_Don’t remind him of what happened. He probably can’t stop thinking about it anyway._

_This is not about the past. It’s about tomorrow and how we’ll deal with it._

Mattia found himself drifting into a weird state of semi-consciousness, losing grip on time and space, focused completely on the decreasing sobs and the warm body in his arms, getting limpier with every shaky breath…

“I need you to join the team for the photoshoot with the trophy.”

Sebastian tensed up. “Is that why you came?” he leaned away and looked him in the eye, just for a moment.

Seeing the hurt in Sebastian’s eyes felt like a sting to the heart. “No… but… I don’t have much time and it really would mean a lot…”

“I have to, don’t I?” Seb snapped. “It’s my duty. Thanks for reminding me about it…” He yanked the ice from Mattia’s hand and pressed it to his eye. “I will be there in a sec… boss…” he grunted.

“You don’t have to do it.” _Wait until he believes you._ “People will understand.”

“Then you should understand not to ask me to go.”

Mattia shook his head. “I need you standing next to me. That’s my personal wish, but… your choice.”

“You’re my boss, I don’t actually have a choice.”

“I’m giving you the choice right now.”

“I’m not going then…”

Mattia frowned, desperately seeking Seb’s gaze. _That’s my fault. I’m bad at this. No tact. No charisma…_ “All right… But if you need anything…”

He saw Seb swallow, ice pressed to the forehead, as if he suddenly had a fever.

_Here goes my boss of the month reward…_

With a heavy sigh, Mattia turned to the door.

“Wait!” Sebastian’s voice sounded differently.

When Mattia turned, the German looked him in the eye. “I will go.”

The Italian felt another lump forming in his throat, but this one was different. He felt pride and sudden relief. “Thank you…”

“Just tell me one thing.”

“Okay, but we’ll have to hurry. They must be looking for me by now…”

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why do you need me standing next to you?”

Mattia hesitated. “I…” Did he even know how to explain it? He figured out an easy explanation, but it was too simplistic, and it would’ve given Sebastian the wrong picture. “You’re part of the team.”

Sebastian huffed. “Thanks… I didn’t know…”

“You’ve been carrying this team on your shoulders for so long… motivating people, cheering people up, keeping the spirits high even at the darkest hours… This year…” Mattia paused to clear his throat. “It’s not the best year, but you’ve always had my back.”

Sebastian nodded, tears glistening in his eyes again. “I just… I’m so sorry for letting you all down…”

“Stop it, you can’t cry again,” Mattia grabbed a towel and proceeded to wipe Sebastian’s face. “We’re not talking about that. I just want this day to end and it’s not going to end if we don’t go to that f- freaking photo shoot…”

“Shouldn’t you be happy?” Sebastian asked, suddenly he wasn’t so concerned to be treated like a child.

“I am happy, but not a 100%.”

“Because of me…”

“Because of the fact that I really… really want to help you but I don’t know how…”

Sebastian touched his hand. “Maybe you just did.”

In his mind Mattia leaned forward and kissed Sebastian’s forehead. A part of him was melting at the thought, but the other part freaked out.

“You don’t have to stay long,” he said, watching Seb put his jacket on.

“I think I can only stay for like… ten seconds before feeling out of place.”

“Ten seconds is fine by me.”

The German nodded. “Can we keep what just happened between us?”

Mattia smiled. “I don’t remember anything happening."

Sebastian smiled back. It was a faint smile and it didn’t last long. But it was still beautiful and Mattia knew he was addicted to it.

_I’m not letting you dim, my star._


End file.
